It’s only September and I’m freaking out.  This coming home to an empty apartment is really getting to me.  I miss Mina so much right now.  She has started her new school and I’m too far away to be a part of it.  At all.  When I talked to her yesterday, she had started her first handwork class – something I dearly love – and I’m not there to see what she’s doing, to hear about her day, to help her with her homework, to have our evening banter over dinner.  By the time she gets home from school, I am already in class and when I get home, she is already in bed.  I get about 10 minutes to talk to her on the phone on my half-hour dinner break while I try to get food and still have enough time to eat.  This is SO hard!  And I still have three and a half months to go…

I’ve been in this serious funk for days now.  Five days now to be exact.  I don’t know what is up other than absolute loneliness.  I am one of those people who, although I love (need) to have time alone, I also love to be around the folks that I cherish.  A lot.  One of my bff’s came to town for a wedding this past weekend – I saw her for a few hours Friday night, she spent the night and left super early the next day.  She’s in the middle of hiking the Appalachian Trail with her 12-year-old daughter and is gone until early November.  In many ways it’s good that I am here and having to make my own way, as I’ve said before, but damn…

So that’s where I am.  I know this time will go quickly.  I know I’m where I should be.  I know Mina and I will be alright.  But tonight it just all hurts.

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